SAHMs vs SAHWwC

Stay at home moms versus stay at home women with children. Yes, there is a difference. I have respect for stay at home mothers. There is a negative stereotype that lands on these poor women - that they are lazy and sit at home watching soap operas while their kids run wild or that they play on the computer all day while their children are planted in front of the television. This, however, is not the case. A stay at home mother efficiently manages and interacts with her home and children. I am fortunate to know mothers as well as women who have children (because there is a difference), and though I am no professional, I can offer my own insight.

Stay at home mom:
Maintains a clean, functional home
Serves 3 full meals and optional snacks
Provide a stimulating learning environment for children
Efficiently manages a budget (with spouse if applicable)

Women who stay home with children:
Do not maintain a clean home
Do not cook or opt for fast food on a regular basis
Do not focus on child development and offer an unregulated amount of television time
**Has reckless spending habits or leaves the budget to someone else

    **This may or may not apply. Some women who stay home can manage a budget just fine.

In my opinion, to be considered a stay at home mother, she must meet at least the first 3 criteria, otherwise she is merely a woman who stays home with her children.

I have spent countless hours and energy maximizing my efficiency with my home and my children. I have done so as a wife, later as a single mother, and now do so with a significant other and his child in the mix. Together, we have 4 children: 2 four year olds, a three year old and a two year old. Every single morning I serve a healthy breakfast and immediately follow with dishes. I also provide an age appropriate homeschooling regimen to each of the children for about 60 minutes every day. At this young age I believe they would start to lose focus if we studied any longer. The kids help me with laundry (we have 1-2 loads each day) and then are free to play in their rooms, the play room, or color at the activity table while I vacuum and do a quick walk-through to take care of any messes. While each day varies, we also play in the back yard, do arts and crafts, go to the park, ride bikes/trikes/scooters... anything active and fun. Then I serve a healthy lunch which is followed by the kids picking up their play room and a nap. I generally use their nap time as prime cleaning time even though there isn't a whole lot of cleaning to do. I have taught my kids to clean up their own dishes, pick up for themselves downstairs, and I don't allow toys downstairs (we have 900 square feet upstairs for toys to be strewn about). I also make the most of my time by multitasking as often as possible. Each day during one of my bathroom breaks I spend 20 seconds wiping down the counters and mirror. During another break I scrub the toilet - yes, daily. I maintain and do mini tasks in the kitchen every time I cook. The kids clean up all their toys upstairs every night before bed. The chores that need to be done a few times a week instead of daily such as mopping, dusting, baseboards, vacuuming the staircase, windows, etc... I do during nap time. I try to always let the kids help me make dinner and we usually have it ready by the time my significant other gets home from his day at work. Weekends are always devoted to family time. While I understand the daily routine of every person is different and would vary greatly from mine, I still believe mothers are different than women with children and a positive, clean, enriching environment is paramount in raising happy, healthy children.